From my heart to God's ears.

[star_incentive]

This is one of those random posts. One that I'm afraid to write, and things I'm afraid to right. My Father in heaven put me here on this earth, He showed me his mercy, and gave me great worth. But as I stand before you today, and always, I don't understand my Father's free ways. I'm fat, and I'm ugly- certainly not his likeness. And I'm mean, and selfish- nothing to his kindness. So how can you tell me my Father still loves me, when I know in my head that cannot be. I wake up everyday, and I sing from my heart- words to the Lord, to my Jesus. And everyday, the words grow emptier, and and more hollow. For now it seems anorexia is whom I chose to follow. This frustrates me so much, and I wonder every moment, "Why can't I feel your touch? I know you are here Lord, I asked , and you came. But I must ignore you- I have to work, images to be slain." I want forgiveness, and a life of health, but the other side seems to hold SUCH great wealth. College is coming and I'm on my way. I'm starting my OWN life...why does this bring me dismay. "LORD! JESUS! Hear me! I NEED YOU!" Why the hell do I need anorexia too?
:starsStar:stars
p.s. This isjust want I wanted to write about. It just...came out this way.

[Chriszgirl]

Whoa....sort of mixed feelings about this one! I think God isn't putting the burden of an ED on any of us.....it is up to us to fight and win the war.....we must look within ourselves and find our own beauty and worth...He already knows what we can do and acheive, but He wants us to do it on our own......do you pray? I just got the feeling you want God to just make it disappear......he doesn't intrude into yout heart....you have to hold heartedly allow him in! :love Lot of :love and an :angel to help your anger and pain!

[doggie]

:hugonstar:hugoff I hope you are able to come to terms in your relationship with God. It can get very confusing at times but we are on a journey and there is a purpose to every twist and turn.....keep praying and then listen quietly for a while.....take care of you ....:love :dog

[preston]

Star,
Do you doubt that Heavenly Father still loves you? Think about your earthly parents. No matter what you do they still love you, right? Multiply their love infiniti and that is the love God has for you. His love is uncoditional, trust me. I have done some pretty awful things in my life , yet I know with surety that Heavenly Father still loves me. Even my mom and dad on earth still love me, even if I have done things that were not right. And I am not even saying that you are wrong for having an eating disorder. The most faithful and valiant souls are given the greatest trials. This means that before you got a physical body, you must have been one strong spirit. Just keep praying and be specific with your prayers. Ask God if He loves you and be sensitive to the feelings that arise when you pray. The feelings you feel in your heart are from God. it is the Holy Spirit. I hope you will come to know that yoou are so loved, star. Take care. Love, preston

[preston]

Star_incentive,
I hope you are doing all right. I also hope you find answers to what you are looking for. Sorry about all the "talking" earlier. Hope I didn't make you uncomfortable. Have a good day.

[Pella]

:hugonStar:hugoff You are made in His likeness...because God sees you through the eyes of Christ His son! Like Preston said, He has infinite love...so much love for you....you can't even imagine. It's beyond our puny little minds. I really have a hard time grasping this concept sometimes! Thank goodness He also doesn't measure our worth by our physical characteristics. He looks at our hearts!:love
And one day Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body!
Astounding! Somewhere, somehow within you is the pattern of the heavenly person you will become. Now that is cool. First Corinthians thirteen:twelve says, "Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." We will have the mind of Christ and new ressurected bodies! What a promise. :grin
Love beth :sun:love

[Carriej]

:hugon Star :hugoff

I know how you feel because I've struggled with this one too.

Here's something for you to think about. God didn't give us the burden of an ed. That's just part of life. But..Keep asking for His help. He's right beside you in your battle. I know that sometimes our prayers don't get answered quickly enough, but He DOES hear you.

Don't give up. God WANTS to help you.