What has worked for you?

[Beeha]

I have heard so many suggestions for raising self-esteem, from my therapist, from friends, from websites (including this one) and they seem to make sense, I just am wondering what has worked for you guys?

[sillygirl]

beeha,

well, i don't always do so hot with the self esteem issues myself :ugh, but the one thing that helps me most is standing up to my negative inner critic and challenging what it has to say. i often find that i can win out in the battle between the two of us, because my inner critic is way too harsh. it helps with not getting dragged down any farther for me. :grin hope you are able to find some good advice here!

luv,
silly :bug

[jazmeena]

Hello Beeha & Fellow :pinkfishys who want to raise self-esteem. Here are some tips:
-Smile, even if you have to force it. smiling makes you happier & draws more people towards you. it can also make you feel better about yourself simply b/c it upbeats your mood
-Look Your Best. i like to dress nice & fix myself for work. when you look good, you'll feel good. it can also make you more confident
-Learn How To Take A Compliment. say thank you & mean it. if someone says a nice thing about you, that nice thing must be true! :winky

Thought this might help.

[Pella]

:hugonBeeha:hugoff
Jasmeena's suggestions were great! Especially about smiling.:grin I've found being an encourager especially helpful. When I encourage others I find I'm encouraged in the process too.

Self-esteem isn't just something you wake up with one day. It's developed over time. Sometimes I wish I could just take a magic pill and be transformed into a person with high self-esteem! :happy

You start to have self-esteem when you are friends with the face in the mirror, when you take the time to get to know and understand yourself better. For me....this is finally beginning to happen ever since I started recovery. I'm learning to treat myself with respect and actually learn to love myself. It wasn't always that way. I think I hated myself because of the ed behavior.....and most of it was unconscious? The hatred just came out in destructive ways. Self-esteem has to do with a healthy sense of emotional security. To have that......I think you have to confront your fears, and deal with them.....whatever that means to you? For me....that means getting up every day and reminding myself that as a human being...I have worth and am deserving of other people's care in addition to my own.
And as Jasmeena pointed out......smile and compliment yourself.
Love beth :sun

[Allison LHF]

For me, it's taking a "ME DAY" This can involve whatever you want, whatever makes you happy, little things to pamper yourself. (I like to start with a bubble bath and a good book) give yourself a manicure, sing out loud, pick out a nice outfit even if you have nowhere to go, sleep if you need it, whatever.

I especially try to focus on looks because...well I only do this like once every other month so I don't think it's being too self-absorbed or anything, and also if I can convince myself that I look good, then I'll FEEL good.

:bounce Allison :bounce

[Beeha]

Allison
I'm a big Sarah McLachlan fan, and I have all her albums, but I can't place the quote you wrote. Can you tell me what song it's from?
:cute Thanks

[Allison LHF]

oh yeah, I'm a huge sarah fan too!

anyway, that quote is from the song "Home" off of the album "Solace" which I think is my favorite album of hers so if you don't have it I would strongly recommend it!

:bounce Allison :bounce

[Beeha]

Allison--
I actually do have Solace, and I pulled it out to listen to today cause I haven't in a while. I think my fav album, though, is Fumbling Towards Ecstasy cause to me, that's the album I can relate to the most. Also, I haven't gotten the new Remixed yet. Have you? Is it good? It's on my wish list...

[silly]

okay so what has worked for me... as lame as this sounds it was the maria shriver book that helped my self esteem. i guess reading that i'm not the only one with all these fears helped a lot. hey even she had a tough time too. i just always thought that i was the only one who had these fears. i was afraid of everything. i'm not so much anymore. i'm getting better... go me.

:canada
silly