Chriszgirl
07-08-2001, 09:43 PM
:sad Well, i'll start off by saying i'm very :sad and shocked! I spoke to my father whom i have not spoken to in almost two years......he made a very nasty remark about the name i chose for my son ....we have not spoken since the day after i gave birth! Well, to talk about needing to release....he emails me....though we have been slightly emailin on and off for a couple weeks.....i started it all by saying how i'm at peace with this and how i don't hate him anymore and i wish happiness and :love....well, after emails back n forth...he finally sends me his phone # to call him....well, i debated all day! My husband was totally supportive even though he thinks he's an sob! So, i called....it was pleasant, but weird.....so much has changed, he doesn't even know my son, my world....which i don't even think i want him to ! Its soooo weird, i cannot journal about this....b/c i start crying :sad So, i am venting here......sorry, but i am :happy i go see my t tomorrow! I guess i need to put my son first and his best interest first...my dad just has this place in my heart that only a dad can have.....and after all the crap he has put me through my WHOLE life, why can't i say SCREW HIM!!!!!! DAMN. i wish i could hold a grudge! Well, hoping to hear some type of idea cause i'm at a total loss:scared! Thanks for :ear and i need a good :cry