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View Full Version : ok,this is what i get on my "i think i'm falling in love with you"


nefretiti
04-02-2012, 04:42 AM
honestly, this was my most vunerable place. and i tried to really speak up and say my emotions cause i really like this guy and i think i'm falling in love with him. after **** months i think i can make a difference between "like" and "falling in love". although i am not sure is there in english some better word for those butterflies and all that feeling, that first feeling u get when u really really like somebody as a person and you want to know them more and more...i would deffer it from love that you can say you feel for somebody after a log time, after you've been through a lot and after you feel that more rational feeling of understanding committment and so on.

anyways, i didn't wanna repeat myself "i hav butterflies" - i wanted to name my feelings with more suitable words and i could't say it in person. anyways i texted it. and what i got was the answer : wow, you do:)? and then i said, well, i think i am. and then i got the answer : but i need time .... and then i wanted to slap the guy over his face, luckyly he was not there!

so, now, what the hell! i am dating a guy that is so sweet with me. we love being together. we talk a lot and share things. we have fun together. he says he is just enchanted with me. then he makes so many small surprised for me. and he treats me so well, sometimes i feel like a queen. and he asked me to be his girlfriend and he wants me to go everywhere with him and do stuff with him. and we make love, not like having sex, but with that connection and look and all that. and now he says "i need time", like i asked him something! i didn't ask anything in return, i think all that i just wrote explains that this guy likes me a lot and that's fine. and now that i say this i got the answer that to me sounds like all of those behaviours stated above mean nothing!

then i get an even more stupid statement:lets just enjoy each others company:). dah?! and what the hell other we could do?! if i say i think i'm falling in love with you, does it mean i am imposing something on him? no! i am just epressing what i feel, and now i just feel this enormous block in front of me and i have the urge never ever to be honest with my feelings again.

sflathinker
04-02-2012, 01:03 PM
Tell him what you told us, that you aren't asking for a response but rather just wanted to share how being with him makes you feel. Not everyone falls at the same speed. You texted something intimate, perhaps he didn't realize how serious and vulnerable you were about confessing that.

nefretiti
04-04-2012, 03:35 AM
hm, i texted that again, kind of....and he said nothing. later on, i was kind of trying to hint on what i said about falling in love and that i don't pressurize or expect him sto feel/say the same. and what i got now was even more confusing- thathe is very careful withme, and that he still keeps his distance cause he doesn't want to be hurt and he can be hurt easily. and i told him everybody can be hurt easily and he thinks he could easier...that was kind of an explanation that he is holding himself not to fall in love with me. but i also find it strange cause when i was telling him the same, he was surprised and he was encouraging me not to prevent myself from falling in love with him.

sflathinker
04-04-2012, 06:40 AM
Perhaps he believes his feelings are stronger and he is scared. Just because you don't talk about your feelings doesn't mean you don't feel them. Sharing your feelings is a beautiful thing, but it shouldn't be done just to find out how someone else feels about you. Continue being honest about how you feel. This is YOUR journey.

Kensington
04-04-2012, 07:32 AM
Are you ok with the idea that he may not fall in love with you for a long time, if at all? Are you looking for a long term relationship or are you willing to wait and see what happens and be ok with that?

nefretiti
04-04-2012, 03:22 PM
kensigton, i didn't understand.

Kensington
04-04-2012, 03:27 PM
What I mean is do you feel like you'll be ok if he doesn't fall in love with you? Do you still want to be with him (at least for now) even if he can't commit to something permanent or say that he's definitely in love with you?

For some people, it would be fine to continue dating without having him say he also loves you. For others, it could be a dealbreaker.

sflathinker
04-04-2012, 03:41 PM
The man I loved very very much couldn't tell me he loved me and I dont regret the relationship, but I saw later how much my actions and behavior was in an effort to prove to him I was worthy. Remember, everyone falls differently, and some choose to hold themselves back from falling. Don't let it change you. Continue having fun and assess how things are in a few weeks or months time. If he's still not ready then re evaluate.

pantherr
04-09-2012, 10:31 AM
I had a very, very similar experience when I told my bf I love him! He also said he was trying to protect himself from getting hurt, among other things.

I really think you need to talk to him about this in person - just tell him you don't expect anything back, you just wanted to let him know you feel. Which is a very brave thing to do, by the way. :lubdub I know it isn't easy to let yourself love someone, and it can be very complicated, but don't overanalyze what he is saying. He must care deeply about you.

Still, in my opinion you should let him know how that conversation made you feel. In person.