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BeStillAndKnow
03-15-2012, 11:36 PM
I just wanted to ask if any of you have dated online? Did it go well how long did it last if it was a long distant relationship; etc. Ive only done this once,

:redflag but that was when I was raped.:redflag
Im just scared of meeting someone in public or at all especially on line.

Just need to meet a guy in a healthy atmosphere that is encouraging and leads to a long term relationship. I do want to have kids but only with the right guy.

Any ideas? Healthy ones.

Leslie

noparenthesis
03-16-2012, 12:03 AM
I've done quite a bit of it. I met my ex online and dated him for a year and a half; I've also met up with guys that I've had one/two dates with, had a one night stand with a guy I met online. I've had it work pretty well, but I know other people who it's worked less for (for example, I introduced my best friend to online dating and she's has mostly positive results, but she did go on a few dates with one guy who shoplifted while she was on a date with him).

The thing I like most about online dating is that you can screen people out - choose people whose interests are similar to your own, don't sound creepy, etc.

Just because you meet up with a guy doesn't mean that you have to do anything with him at all - if a date goes badly, it's generally a dinner or coffee out, but nothing more than that. At least in my experience anyway.

For what it's worth, the times I've been raped it was by people I met in person. But everyone's experience is different, and I know there are people who have had much more negative experiences dating online than I've had.

catsIlove
03-16-2012, 12:08 AM
I have had it go well and go really bad. I'm with neither now but good friends with one though he did string me along for quite a bit.
I don't recommend plenty of carp (or fish if you like lol)

sflathinker
03-16-2012, 10:30 AM
I've done plenty of sites (and plenty of fish isn't for those.who lack lots of online dating experience). Try eharmony. It's not cheap and it allows you to weed out people ny being very specific about your needs. As they are too. I've never been in a bad situation or threatened bit I've been out with jerks. It's no different then meeting someone who a friend sets you up with. Be smart, don't trust someone you don't feel comfy with. Don't be talked into something you don't feel safe doing. We are all different....you want a guy who appreciates you...not turn you into something else.

twiggyyay
03-17-2012, 03:21 AM
I also did it and met a guy that I ended up having a short relationship with. We didn't really work out but I don't regret our time; he was nice and gentle to me. If you feel comfortable with online dating - despite of what happened to you once - give it a try but take care of yourself. I don't think everyone online is a rapist or murderer but it CAN be dangerous as you know. Watch out.

BeStillAndKnow
03-17-2012, 06:25 PM
Have you guys heard of the "lunch date" my therapist said that this might be a better deal.

I guess its a timed thing where your at a table and you stay in your seat but the guys switch seats after a certain amount of time.?

Is this more real, and how do you sign up for something like this?

nothingxtragic
04-07-2012, 07:27 PM
I have tried it as well, I only went on one it lasted about a year. I made the first date a double date with a friend, I felt more comfertable that way.

Fairytales
04-08-2012, 03:48 PM
I met my boyfriend online; If you use the reputable dating sites, I'd say its really worth doing :)

DreamsInBlack&White
04-08-2012, 06:51 PM
I've been married for ages and only dated in college, so I have no first-hand experience, but does your area have an "Events and Adventures" type thing? It seems like that might be a safe way to meet people in a way that doesn't put the pressure on you and allows you to meet a bunch of different people with similar interests to your own. Other than that, do you have a particular faith or spiritual belief system? If so, I'd *highly* suggest finding a big church/temple/house of worship and getting involved with their singles ministry. That way, you know that the people you're meeting share your faith and (hopefully) values, and you have something in common to build on. I hope that helps and isn't in any way offensive - I never know how much to put about faith-based things on websites...