View Full Version : So So So depressed now...

02-03-2012, 03:52 PM
My boyfriend of two years (almost two years...will be one april fifth) just told me that he needs space. He wants at least a month and a half away to let his antidepressants work. He just went to a psychiatrist yesterday and so he hasn't even started taking them. He says he wants to be with me but then why does he have to break things off. I feel like he is just using the depression as an excuse to break up with me. I am so hurt right now and now I just want to get really thin so that when he sees me he will be shocked. I am so hurt right now. Could really use some support.
We were seeing each other everyday...and he said that it made him stop longing for me. He used to want to marry me and now he doesn't. I really don't understand...and then last night he was saying how he needed space so that he could marry me and be a good father and husband someday for me. :cry
I am so hurt. I have never been hurt by anyone so much in my life.
And worst of all...my birthday is march second and we won't even get to celebrate it.

02-03-2012, 04:00 PM
The worst bit is your birthday?

I'm sorry you're so hurt by this. :gimmehug

But he's being honest. Wouldn't you prefer that? He wants to get his mental health straight. Granted he could have been more tactful etc.. :ummm

But I couldn't really read this without getting past the part where you said you want to get really thin to shock him.
As a punishment? For wanting a break? For being hurt?

I find that kinda manipulative. How about using your mouth instead and just tell him you are hurt?
Setting out to intentionally use your body and not your voice isn't healthy. If it happened subconsciously then that's a little different.

But either way, you need to tell him you are hurt and confused.

I'm sorry, this sounds hard. I would hate if my boyfriend said these things :gimmehug

02-03-2012, 05:59 PM
The only way to be a good partner is to be true to yourself and take care of yourself first. Granted, you don't leave the relationship to do that. That's the difference between commitment and a relationship you can say "I want space". I've been on both ends. Infact, i told my bf of a year and a half that I wanted space and it took me a year of recovery to want a committed relationship again. It was a bad year but in the end, I am healthier. I'm not suggesting this will work for you or your relationship. Looking back, I can't believe I ever did that to him, but I wasn't healthy and unhealthy people do hurtful things. Also, I was being very selfish. Had I loved myself more and been able to give and receive more love, i would have seen that in a committed relationship, you don't get a mulligan (golf term for starting over).