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Flor
01-08-2012, 07:31 AM
I am a college student and am surrounded by people and by potential friends, and I would even say that I have a good number of friends, it is just that often I still find myself completely lonely. How do I reach out? Sometimes I do not feel physically okay enough to reach out. I am still underweight, although I have a hard time accepting that.

Is there a way to deal with loneliness and anxiety even when I can't reach out to people? Or are people the only solution?

Thanks so much in advance,
flor

noparenthesis
01-08-2012, 08:19 AM
I definitely understand you on feeling lonely - I have a few pretty good friends in college, but I wish I had more, or at least someone around that I could lean on when things get tough. I'm going through some crappy stuff right now and there are only one or two friends here that I feel comfortable opening up with (I do have some friends that live farther away that I've been talking to also but it's hard when they don't live near me).

I think some people are easier to reach out to - do you have a T? Do you have family that you are close to? I find when things with friends get overwhelming it's easier to reach out to those people. I also think that if you're not feeling ok enough to reach out in real time, talking to people online (whether you know them in real life or not) could be helpful - visiting chat rooms, forums, etc. I know a lot of people get advice this way especially when they don't feel comfortable asking for it from people they physically know.

Good luck. I hope you begin to feel better.

Flor
01-09-2012, 08:31 PM
Thank you so much, noparenthesis. It is just so tough when it feels like there are a million people OUT THERE but I am just trapped in myself.

I am not very close to my family, which is something I am dealing with in therapy right now, and something I am definitely not proud of. Thanks to my ED I spent most of my teen years in treatment and didn't really make any real friends. The only person that I even feel vaguely comfortable talking to about these things on campus is my best friend, and the truth is she is just so very confused and scared by my illness that she doesn't really offer advice anymore, she just sits there, wide-eyed, nodding sadly. I can talk to my T about it, and I she mentioned that I should e-mail her anytime I feel realy bad since I do not have that family or friend support. My boyfriend is very supportive, and I can always talk to him about these things, I guess it is just that I do not want our relationship to be like the one I have with my father, where everything is based on my eating disorder and what I am eating and not eating and exercising.

I think that using online forums definitely helps me, oh man. I just want to thank you for reading this. :shy