View Full Version : Temp Long Distance Relationship?

11-29-2011, 12:30 PM
My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. He's a musician and sound engineer so he frequently tours. It's hell for both of us but it's never more that a couple weeks at the longest. I miss him when he tours but it's work and he's busy all the time traveling and loading in and out of venues. I trust him completely, but recently he was given the opportunity for a summer job for a high profile headphone company. That would take him away for two to three months. What's worrying me a lot is that it's not traveling like usual, it's moving somewhere and settling in somewhere without me. I'm not there to reinforce his roots back home. I'm worried that he'll come back and feelings will have changed or he wont come back at all. I'm also worried that he'll meet someone and I'm not there to remind him of his feelings and life with me. I've talked to him about this and he is certain that it will not happen and that he plans on marrying me so why would he do that. He plans on us seeing each other every weekend, and talking everyday. He's confident that his feelings wont disappear in fact they'll get stronger because he'll miss me so much. I trust that he's being honest, but I can't get these worries out of my head.

11-29-2011, 05:15 PM
Lilmouse, I think these are normal anxieties about separation. ****-**** months is a pretty long time to be apart - but it's not the end of the world. If you know you can see him every weekend and talk every day, I don't think you actually have much to worry about at all.

But if I were to play devil's advocate: let's say he does change on tour. How would you deal with that? Do you have a support system other than just him?

Also, summer is a way's away, so don't let that get in the way of what's happening right now. You might change between now and then. Not to be a total cliche, but when these things happen you kind of have to roll with the punches.

11-29-2011, 06:02 PM
My boyfriend and I have been doing a long distance relationship since September, and I had the EXACT same feelings that you currently have. I will tell you right now that things are just as great as there were before he left! I have stayed pretty darn busy. If you're not at home most of the time and anticipating a phone call with him, it makes things a whole lot better. All I know is, if things get rocky, it honestly is for the best. If things get challenging, but you both overcome it, then that says a lot about the strength of the relationship. You will never know if you are both strong enough to overcome this challenge unless you try. And if it isn't strong enough to do long distance, it wouldn't be strong enough even if you lived together a couple years down the road.

If you ever need someone to turn to about long distance, feel free and send me a message :). I understand!