Nervous

[Nikkiw]

Hi everyone,
i am new to this. i have only been in recovery for two months. i am in college and began seeing a therapist about **** month before the semester ended. my family has been very supportive and i have found recovry to be going o.k. it hasn't been perfect. anyways, i am really concerned about going back to school. i am worried i will relapse because my friends don't know about my problem. i am afraid i will just hide it like i have been doing for the past year and a half. i don't know what to do. i think telling them would be more stressfu.l, but i don't want to relapse. any advice would be great.

thanks,
Nikkiw :sun

[FearfulJakey]

:hugon Nikkiw :hugoff

I REALLY don't have any advice, and I guess it's only YOU who can decide whether to let your friend/s in on this, or not, and that depends on how you feel about it... Do you feel you can trust them, do you think they'd want to know and support you, rather than not know... I can't tell you, but listen to your heart.

But I do think sometimes it's best to tell, sometimes it can "protect you from yourself", ya know? And it's also wonderful to have someone to talk about it with in real time.

On the other hand you seem motivated to recover, you have great support from your family (which is awesome! :happy), you have your therapist... I think you're gonna be okay :rainbow. But like you said, recovery is not easy, and it's not a smooth road, definitely some bumps here and there.... So, you're prepared!

And I just wanted to welcome you here in the :bowl! :grin Good to meet ya.

[CncrdGirl]

:hugon :gimmehug Nikkiw :gimmehug :hugoff ~
Hey there :fishy! Welcome to the :bowl! I am so :happy that you were able to find us here! First of all, you can pat yourself on the back for getting to a therapist and starting to work on :kicking the Ed. And secondly you found us here! Another very pro-you choice! But I hear what you are saying about college. I am in college myself and it has been a tough road here. I am now in my third year, but after my first semester, I took two semesters off.., then came back for a semester... took more time off.. came back last semester and now if fincances work out, I hope that I can be here to stay.The Ed keeps poking its head in, but after this long, I have learned to manage it here. I think being in college with an ED is hard because it feeds them and breeds them. I am a cross country runner at my school, and while my coach has been great and wonderfully supportive, it is a competitive sport that has everything to do with the condition of your body. It is a group where five pounds can make the difference. So it has been hard. At first, I didn't tell anyone, because I was ashamed and it was a title that followed my all thru highschool and I didn't want that again. However, I needed it. I would REALLY SUGGEST that even though you have a therapist, that you hook up with one at school. Don't feel like you have to tell your friends, but know that the more you hide it, the more the Eating disorder is enabled. I know that once I started telling people, going as far as speaking in our health science classes, that that gave me some sort of credibility and then so many people started coming out of the woodwork and sharing their stories with me. It is scary though and you have to be VERY careful. However, if you have faith in yourself and work hard to set up support systems for yourself there, I am sure you can do it! Do you participate in anything as far as sports go or anything of the like? Coaches or directers are usually good with being there to support you. Also maybe a campus paster or nurse ( I know mine too well!) Even your RA or whatever they call them on your hall at school. Any network of support you make for yourself is going to be great! But you must do what is all good for you. Only you know your situation. I am at a very small private school in MN. You may be at a large state school in CA for all I know.. but either way, every college has resources. You just need to know what they are and be willing to use them .Best of :clover to you and again, welcome to the :bowl!
Have a great rest of the weekend! :love, Amy

[septangel]

Nikkiw,

I just wanted to say Hello and welcome to the :bowl. No need to be nervous. Most of us are just :fishy 's and there aren't toooooo many sharks in these waters cept me on a bad day :cheesy. It's been awhile since I've been in college and yes, I remember the stress however, not meaning to be a downer here but, life is stressful and there is just no way to have a stress free life. Later in life there's bills, jobs, MEN, (THE BIGGEST CAUSE OF STRESS IN THE UNIVERSE FOR ME), kids, and other responsibilities. They say the only absolutes are death and taxes but, I think we can safely add stress too. Get yourself health wise to a point where you feel you have enough tools to get through the school year. It will be easy to find a support system at school if you don't feel you are ready to divulge information to your friends. Good luck and post often.

Kathy :angel

[Korky]

:hugon Nikkiw :hugoff

Hi and welcome to the :bowl! I just wanted to let you know that whatever you decide, do what you feel in your heart and do what you are ready for...no need to rush things, especially when taking baby steps thru recovery is stessful enuf. I guess what I am saying is to be honest with YOU. If it is going to make you relapse, do what you can to make it NOT so. Support is a HUGE part of and ED and I am SO very happy that you have your families. The MORE support the better in my mind...that's why my T, my Grp, all the fishies and my family are such a huge support system for me. Its still tough, so just be honest with yourself when you feel yourself slipping into old patterns. Good :clover to you Nikkiw, I truly wish you the very best...and remember, the :bowl is here for support too!!! Take care of YOU!!!

Lots of :love and :gimmehug...welcome!!!