Pushing back Personal Limitations

[Pella]

:hugonFishies:fishy:hugoff
I've been kind of having a tough week and yesterday someone said to me.....
"I hope you become frustrated and challenged enough to begin to push back the very barriers of your own personal limitations!" I had them repeat that one to me a couple of times and even write it down.
I love that....because I'm up for a challenge! And I have built some pretty high walls in my personal life. A lot of times without even realizing it?! Some of it has to do with recovery and ed issues...but some of it has been due to pure laziness. I know I'm responsible for the effort and not the outcome, and I feel like I've made progress in recovery. But, I haven't challenged myself in any other areas of my life lately and it's time!:grin This post is my wake up call to get moving!:muhaha
Love beth :sun

[starbrightstarlight]

:hugon Beth :hugoff

Good for you! and Good :clover luck!

[Garth]

Dear Beth,

What a life indeed !
Challenges are funny
for there is a challenge in everything . . . everywhere
no matter where . . . or how . . . we are

It starts from the first moment of conciousness
until the last
now . . . that's a mighty long time . . . yes ?

I've been having a hard time too
on top of that . . . .
. . . I've been giving myself a hard time about it
hmmmm . . . this is not helping

maybe it's ok to have a hard time
to be lazy
for in this life
we are truly of comparison to no one
no one knows what we need to do . . . or not
I keep wishing for someone or something to reveal it to me
still . . . here I am
and though I judge myself unfavorably too often
I am no less of a wonderous human soul .

Struggle and learn
resign and give
lifes endless cycle . . . continues .

Good nite

:love Garth :sun

[Pella]

I agree :hugonGarth:hugoff that challenges are in everything and everywhere! And it can be relative.....what is a challenge for one person may be a "walk in the park" to someone else? I definately find I'm faced with more challenges in Recovery. :happy

Pondering........I sometimes imagine myself in different life circumstances. Perhaps paralyzed, bedridden or having some incurable disease? Could I or Would I see the blessing in every situation or challenge then? I have so much awe and respect for those who deal with physical/mental disabilities. One of the reasons I'm drawn to working with the mentally ill in my job.

Everyone's at a different place in their life....but everyday we're going to meet challenges. Lessons to learn----growing pains. I guess it's all in how you look/interpret the challenges and hopefully look to them as gifts? Without them we'd surely stagnate, enjoying life little, offering life nothing?

I love what you said, " struggle & learn, resign & give....life's endless cycle continues." Pure poetry and TRUTH. Opening new doors, closing old doors and being willing to go forward.

:hugonGarth:hugoff if your are having a hard time right now.....and you are wishing for someone or something to reveal what you need to do?.......I will reveal a truth for you and that is "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." I've said it before.....but you are such a vessel of love, you can let it change the direction of your life/feelings. Love is the great equalizer. May I remind you of how much your meaningful/healing replies mean to this fishy:fishy.
Love beth :sun

[Chriszgirl]

:cloverTo BETH Good luck!:clover i hope you are to speedy and full victory!I hope you succeed and acheive all what you wish....you sound really determined!:love

:hugon Cris:hugoff
:flower to have a friend is to be a friend:flower

:bult ATTITUDE is a little thing that makes a BIG difference:bult:pinkfishy

:fishjump:fishjump:fishjump:fishjump:fishjump

[Pella]

:hugonStarbrightstarlight:hugoff
Thanks! And I love your signature quote!:winky

:hugonChriszgirl:hugoff
You're right.....attitude makes a huge difference!:happy
Love beth :sun

[Garth]

Dear Beth ,

I recieve as much meaning and healing from these offerings
as you do in recieving

I crave communication from the heart
It seems life without it
is just going thru the motions

You spoke of life in different circumstances
wow
so many possibilities . . . good and bad
are you glad as you are Beth ?

My own potential is both inspiring
and freightening
So . . . for today
I'll be as Garth .

I value communicating with you very much
Thanks for these precious moments

:love Garth :sun

[CerealKiller]

This is good, because it's something I've been working a lot with. Exploring new ways to see the world, trying to get in touch with all the various aspects of myself and allow them free communication and a free range of expression.

I will not stifle myself. I am learning to see the limitations that have held me back so many years. They all boil down to a single word: fear.

But fear is not even the greatest obstacle, for there is one who is stronger than fear: trust.

Trust in yourself. Trust in your heart. Allow your heart to sing when it will. Allow it to rage when it will. Maintain emotional honesty at all costs. With yourself if no one else, and maybe in time this will give you confidence to share it with others too. But with yourself, first and foremost, you must be true.

Take pride in the little things. Feel pleasures. Feel your emotions. Express them. Sometimes you may look back and see that their were better ways to express them, but only practice will make it better. Don't give up. Keep working.

After two weeks, because she was on vacation, my therapist finally called back to set up an appointment. :bounce It took great risk to calll her, but I did, and I am glad I did not give up or call back and give her 'what for' when she didn't return my call after a week. But you know what? Even if I had given her 'what-for'' she stilll probably would have called back. And that's good because it's hard to trust if the love is too conditional, if you know it will vanish the first time you fall off the narrow beam of whatever ideals you are expected to walk along in the mind of another.

Most of all learn to play again, and learn to be like a child again, for here is where so much of the healing can take place. Learn to feel wonder again.

This is the road of recovery I am on, and I am truly lost in the wilderness, but moving forward with fear and wonder and I do not regret it at all, only I had forgotten how big the world was, so it is sometimes frightening, a bit overwhelming.

:ufo

[Garth]

Dear CerealKiller,

That was a beau - tiful reply ! :happy

:love Garth:sun

[Pella]

:hugoncerealkiller:hugoff
Yes..Yes...I love it...love it!Trust overcoming fear! I get up in the morning and the first thing I try and remember is to ask myself.....Do you want to experience Love/trust or Fear today? Perfect love casts out fear.

But feeling those pleasures, feelings and emotions and expressing them has been a tribulation, if not a roadblock at times. Obviously the ed can be a real barrier in that department. Here in lies the challenge.....and you're right......learning to PLAY again, to throw off the shackles, get down in the dirt and roll somersaults, or lay in that tub of flourescent jello?! :winky Maybe that kind of fun freedom will loosen the bonds in the penitentiary of my mind?
Love beth :sun

[Eilis]

YES! Get hopping Beth and like NOW! :sarcasm

I always look forward to your realizations. Lately I have been brain fried and not posting so much, but I have been reading. I am glad to see you "seeing" so much. As for challenging limitations, I have come to look forward to it. I like seeing what I can do now, instead of being afraid of what I cant do. I think thats a result from the internal changes that truly put us in recovery. Its like changing the domino effect. Change one thing and it leads to two more and so on. Before you know it you look in the mirror and say WOW how did I get here and I love it! Of course with reflection we know, but I thik a good sign is when things dont require so much effort anymore as they become a permanent part of you. I see that happening with you.

Keep the faith!

:love
Dory

[Pella]

:hugonDory:hugoff
I know what you mean about feeling "brain fried!" I've been so busy lately....I haven't been around the :bowl in the last few days.
Thanks for spurring me on Dory! I just overcame a real challenging limitation today! I was asked to be interviewed for a t.v. show called the "The inside Out" on OCN channel twentynine. I don't watch much tv, so I'd never even heard of the show?
They are doing a half hour segment on Panic disorder and since I had gone through that almost twelve years ago....they asked to interview me! They had already interviewed some doctors on the subject, and they wanted a story from the personal perspective.
What a trip! I had only one day to prepare for the questions. They shot it in a park close by where I work. I'm no media person....but I figured if they can use my story/experience to help others....then go for it!
Just another step out of my shell towards recovery. The funny thing is that several times I almost "slipped" and instead of saying Panic Disorder I almost said [/b]Eating Disorder[/b]!!!:surprise
Love beth :sun

[Eilis]

HOW TRULY AWESOME!!!!!!!! That is mondo cool - u go woman! Its so exciting to feel the empowerment of helping others because you have helped yourself. Not the rescue everyone bit but u have been there and dealt and so your experiences can be a positive in helping others. I often say I dint regret anything in my life because its made me who i am now. Yea I hate eds and all, but i have one and it happened and I cant change that it happened. So why not squeeze some good from it :cute

I am SURE you made a difference!

:love
Dory

[Pella]

Thank you :hugonDory!:hugoff
I can't help but think of that life-saving episode you had with the horse? Kiss? How you can lose yourself when you are there in the moment truly helping, and in your case literally "saving" a life!
I have to truthfully say that every negative experience I've had in life has had a positive bend to it. Working my mentality around to realize this has been the lesson/work! Keep on.
Love beth :sun:love

[silly]

hey that was pretty cool!! i really like that and when you think of it, it could work. yay.

:canada
silly