About Yourself

[Kensington]

How we talk to ourselves is so tied in with how we move forward or don't move forward in life. What do you say about yourself to yourself?

If we learn to treat ourselves with thoughts that are often forgiving, understanding, loving & nurturing, it becomes more natural to have them. It becomes more natural to expect others to treat us with forgiving, understanding, loving & nurturing words & deeds.

If we instead treat ourselves with thoughts that are condemning, hostile, untrusting & unloving, we dig our feet in & stay rooted in these negative tapes. It makes recovery - & life itself - that much more painful & hard to navigate. It also teaches others that they can treat us with condemnation, hostility, lack of trust & unloving words & deeds.


:minifish What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?


:minifish What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?


:minifish How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?

[TheClaw]

Good reminder, Kensington. Not sure if we're supposed to literally answer here, but I will be the first - just in case we're not supposed to then no one else feels weird. :happy

What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?

I'm pretty friendly.


What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?

I'm still sooooo fat. :sad


How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?

If I gave myself positive, loving self-talk on a regular basis, I think I would be downright happier. If I could embrace every part of me (even the imperfections), I would feel better and stronger. And along with the healthier body, mind, and attitude, everyone else might be happier around me as well. I am what I project.

Those are good things to think about, Kensington. Very nice.

[Pinkstardust]

What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?

I honestly really struggle with this, but one thing I've been doing with my cpn is recording nice things other people have said about me and whilst I rubbish most of them, there's a couple I'm allowing myself to believe and enjoy...

I was good at my job.

What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?

I'm a horrible person and inherently evil.

How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?

I'm trying to use mindfulness (from DBT) to recognise negative self-talk and 'let it go'. On the back of that, everytime I recognise a negative self-thought I'm trying to challenge it with a positive alternative. I think using positive self-talk would increase my self-confidence and enable me to do more things.

[LUV to fly SWA]

How we talk to ourselves is so tied in with how we move forward or don't move forward in life. What do you say about yourself to yourself?

If we learn to treat ourselves with thoughts that are often forgiving, understanding, loving & nurturing, it becomes more natural to have them. It becomes more natural to expect others to treat us with forgiving, understanding, loving & nurturing words & deeds.

If we instead treat ourselves with thoughts that are condemning, hostile, untrusting & unloving, we dig our feet in & stay rooted in these negative tapes. It makes recovery - & life itself - that much more painful & hard to navigate. It also teaches others that they can treat us with condemnation, hostility, lack of trust & unloving words & deeds.


:minifish What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?


:minifish What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?


:minifish How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?


:happy "I love my hair!" (This was after I had it done again last Friday)

:cry "Nobody loves me, except God & my dog."

:challenge This is a hard one for me to answer, but I guess I could make a list of my positive qualities. I think I'd have a high (but not too high) self esteem & I'd feel better about myself. :ummm That's all I can think of for now.

Great post! Thanks. :happy

[alwaysjulie]

What was the last nice thing you said about yourself?

I'm proud at how I've managed, recovery, school, and work. That I'm happy for where I am right now, and although other people may expect different, I'm trying to live life for ME, not based on other peoples directions/opinions.

What was the last mean thing you said about yourself?
Really Julia, I can't believe you just ate that.

How can you work on using positive and loving self talk & what do you think that would change in your life?

Well just rereading my answers to the first two gave me some insight. I hold much more value to the negative voices in my head. They circulate with the same short, curt statments and I always use my name. Positive statements on the other hand are much quieter, like that one came out in a conversation yesterday and I said it, but disregarded it in one fowl swoop. So if I regularly refer to affirmations (which I've made every excuse in the book not to do) then my postive voice will become as strong as the negative. If I can get affirmations to circulate with as much certainty as my negative thoughts do, then who knows what I could do with that kind of power. I mean honestly the negative self talk is what fuels the ED and having an ED takes a lot of energy and effort. SO imagine if it were the other way around...?

[gymgirlx]

Nice thing....
someone told me today that I made their day
Mean thing...
when I was at my SKINNIEST weight the door man for our condo waid I'd be a much better runner if I lost **** more pounds :/.

I've really been working on the positive talk thing. Having friends andspending a lot of time with them helps a ton. People like feeling loved :) Everyday I look in the mirror and say positive things, " look at those abs girl", " You're beautiful". Cheesy, but works.

[akashaboo]

Good Gawd girl what have you done to yourself:sad

[hctrack]

:happyWhat was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?
I'm actually smart

:sadWhat was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?
There is no way you're eating tomorrow

:igotitHow can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?
Just challenging negative beliefs, and generally being kinder to myself. Also cahllening balck and white thinking. I think if I were to cut myself some slack I would feel less pressured, and wouldn't be in such a manic frenzy all the time.

[jellylelly]

:bluefishy What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?
I don't remember

:bluefishy What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?
I'm not worth anything

:bluefishy How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?
I worry thinking or saying anything positive will just show the contrast of what I actually am and make me feel worse about myself. I'll end up being more negative.

[haeyoo]

What was the last nice thing you said to yourself about yourself?
"you CAN do this!"

What was the last mean thing you said to yourself about yourself?
"you fat fucking pig"

How can you work on using positive, loving self-talk & what do you think that would change in your life?
I can give myself "props" when I accomplish something I was afraid of accomplishing and be kinder to myself and others. It seems like when I start being nasty to other people, it's just because I'm angry because of who I am.