Desperate for God

[haPEforever]

The title says it all. I need Him in my life so badly and yet i just can't find Him.

I just got out of residential treatment and its incrediably difficult. I'm still purging, though not as often. I binged at church the other day and that made me sooooooo angry. I'm heading down the restricting path again. I feel as if i have no where to turn too. All i want is a place i can go to that would give me the structure of a treament center (but is not one) and some spiritual gudiance. I hate my life. I'm seventeen years old and i act like i'm five.

I'm so angry. All i see is darkness in the world. Just evil. I wish i could find a little happiness. But i won't let myself be happy. Idk y.

I just need a fin...and perhaps someone knows of a place i could go too. i'm so lonely and sad...

[SarahMichelle]

Gosh do I understand so, so, so well. A year ago I could have written your post.

Now I am in such a different place.

Please e-mail me if you like .
But try these places for a starting point.
They are generally where i started, and I think it'll help:
(Everyday Answers) and see if any of the topics look helpful to you (I ended up reading them ALL)
http://www.joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/EverydayAnswers/everydayanswers.htm

I hope this helps too...

The Power of Hope

by Joyce Meyer
I define hope as "the happy anticipation of good things." Are you aggressively hoping for something good to happen to you? Do you wake up in the morning excited and expectant about life? You can do that by learning how to celebrate and enjoy this journey called life.

Everything in life is a process in motion. Without movement, advancement and progression, there is no life. Once a thing has ceased to progress, it is dead. In other words, as long as we live, you and I are always going to be heading somewhere, and we should be enjoying ourselves on the way. God created us to be goal-oriented visionaries. Without a vision, we become bored and hopeless. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, according to Proverbs, but when the desire is fulfilled, it is a tree of life.

There's something about hope that makes people lighthearted and happy. You're not going to be happy if you don't have hope. The more hope you have in God, the happier you become. Biblical hope is a close relative to faith. I don't see how you can have faith without hope because hope is the foundation on which faith stands. Hope believes everything is going to turn out all right—hope is positive! To enjoy life you must maintain a good, positive attitude. God is positive, and He wants positive things to happen to each of us, but that isn't likely to happen if we're not filled with hope and faith.

Some people are afraid to hope because they have experienced so much hurt and disappointment that they don't think they can face any more pain. They refuse to hope so they won't be disappointed. Disappointment is painful! Rather than being hurt again, they simply refuse to hope that anything good will ever happen to them. This type of behavior sets up a negative lifestyle. Everything becomes negative because their thoughts are negative. Proverbs says, For as he [a person] thinks in his heart, so is he....

Your Future Has No Room For Your Past!

Many years ago I was extremely negative because of the devastating abuse that had taken place in my past. The result was that I expected people to hurt me, and they did.

I needed to let go of the past and move into the future with hope, faith and trust in God. I had to get rid of the heaviness of despair, depression and discouragement. And I did, once I dug into the truth of God's Word! I found out that God is ...a shield for me, my glory, and the lifter of my head. I began to turn my negative thoughts and words into positive ones! Now, I am not saying that you and I can get whatever we want by just thinking about it. God has a perfect plan for each of us, and we can't control Him with our thoughts and words. But we can think and speak in agreement with His will and plan for us. We can practice being positive in every situation that arises. Even if what is taking place in your life at the moment seems negative, expect God to bring good out of it as He has promised in His Word. You must understand that before your life can change, your attitude must change.

Hope is a powerful, spiritual force that is activated through our positive attitude. We are assured and know that [God being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose What Satan means for harm, God intends for good. All things work together for good for those who love God. Satan wants to hurt you and have you spend your life distrusting everyone because somebody hurt you when you were a child, while you were in school, in your marriage, on your job, etc. The list of who, what, where and how you can be hurt is endless. You have to say, "No! That is subject to change! I am a child of the living God! Something good is going to happen to me!"

[After all] the kingdom of God is not a matter of food and drink but instead it is righteousness (that state which makes a person acceptable to God) and [heart] peace and joy in the Holy Spirit (Romans ********:********). What this means is that after all the painful things that have happened in your past have come and gone, God still wants you to enjoy every single day of your life. This won't happen, however, until you make up your mind to take hold of the abundant life that Jesus' death and resurrection purchased for you. Until then, the devil will always try to take it away. Jesus said, The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life.

You are a new creationYou don't have to allow the old things that happened to you continue to affect your new life in Christ. As a new creature in Christ Jesus, you can have your mind renewed according to the Word of God: And be constantly renewed in the spirit of your mind and put on the new nature created in God's image, in true righteousness and holinessThings will change for the better when you keep your thoughts filled with hope.

The Bible is full of hope-filled promises for you and me. Through Him also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand. And let us rejoice and exult in our hope of experiencing and enjoying the glory of God Good things begin to happen to you when you rejoice in the hope of experiencing God's favor on a regular basis. Luke tells us that ...Jesus increased in...favor with God and man. You and I are introduced to the favor of God by faith. All of God's promises are activated by faith. We shortchange ourselves when we believe in Jesus but don't believe in His blessings. Believe that you walk in holiness and righteousness believe that you are anointed and believe that you are blessed with every spiritual blessing as promised in Ephesians. Believe Romans when it says you are more than a conqueror!

Everything that is promised in the Bible is for us to rejoice in now. Be glad! Raise your expectancy level. Rejoice in the hope of experiencing God's glory right now. My husband and I believe for many things, but beyond them all, we believe in Someone—Jesus. We don't always know what is going to happen. We just know that it will always work out for our good! The more positive and hopeful we are, the more we will be in the flow of God. In Ephesians the apostle Paul prayed, the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, that He may grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation [of insight into mysteries and secrets having the eyes of your heart flooded with light, so that you can know and understand the hope to which He has called you, and how rich is His glorious inheritance in the saints (His set-apart ones).

This glorious inheritance is for you and me! Second Peter says, For His divine power has bestowed upon us all things that to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him Who called us by and to His own glory and excellence (virtue).

The Hope Of Seeing Change

If there is anything in this world that you can be sure of, it is change. Something is always changing. Why is it, then, that we find ourselves thinking, "Nothing will ever change... I'm always going to be like this... My situation will never change... He'll never change... She'll never change... I'm never going to be as good as so-and-so"? The only thing that will never change is God. For I am the Lord, I do not change... (Malachi)Everything else can change. If you have no hope of seeing change in your situation, change probably isn't going to come. We endure so many things emotionally that we really wouldn't have to suffer if we put our hope in God and stopped looking at all of the circumstances we can't control. We will never enjoy life unless we decide to! In order to live as God intends for us to live, we must truly believe that it is God's will for us to experience continual joy. Then we must decide to enter into that joy, which is essential to our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health.

Proverbs says, A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. Hope makes joy available, just as a lack of hope produces misery. We can choose to enjoy righteousness and peace or stay in the midst of condemnation and turmoil. There are blessings or curses available, and that is why Deuteronomy tells us to choose life and blessings. What do you do while you wait for change? You pray, believe and expect to receive. Maintain a positive attitude, knowing that God is working on bringing your change and that you will see it. Throughout your waiting time, the devil will scream, "It's not going to change; it's going to get worse!" Don't listen to this and become discouraged. Instead, wake up in the morning and say out loud, "This is the day that the Lord has made, and I will rejoice and be glad! Something good is going to happen to me today! Everything in my life that is not right is subject to change! The One who never changes is changing my situation. And while He's doing it, I'm going to enjoy my life!" Put your confidence in God and stop wearing yourself out trying to make things happen. The decision to have a good attitude while your change is coming can change you! Now is the time to decide to enter into the full and abundant life that God wants you to have.

God Is Working Right Now!

Most of us have a hard time believing that God is working on our behalf until we see something happening with our natural eyes. This usually isn't the way God works. He works behind the scenes much of the time. Right now He is changing hearts and drawing sinners unto Him. Right now He is working in our government. Right now God has a plan for your promotion. He may be speaking to your boss about giving you a raise. God is busy working in your life as long as you believe. Hebrews says, Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses].

This scripture begins with the word now. Although the Greek word from which it is translated actually means “but, and, etc.,” rather than “at this point in time,” I still believe the term can be used to describe faith and hope. Faith and hope operate right now! Without them, life isn't enjoyable. Every time I lay aside faith and hope, I stop believing and I lose my peace. And as soon as I lose my peace, my joy goes with it. Make a decision to be a now person. God has a good plan for your life right now. Trust Him today. Believing God brings you into His rest and puts an end to the torment caused by impatience and anxiety while you're waiting. No matter how hopeless your situation seems to be or how long it has been that way, I know you can change because I did. It took time and heaping helpings of the Holy Spirit, but it was worth it. It will be worth it for you, too. Whatever happens, trust in the Lord and trust in the power of hope! My hope is in God who never changes. Nothing is impossible with Him. He is a big God, and I'm believing Him for big things. How about you?

[haPEforever]

thank u sooo much for letting me read such inspiring works. I will comment on them a little later but i really need to get something out.

So last night i told my parents i was going over to a friend's house and actually went out with this boy. I haven't seen him in over a year. Long story short we hooked up nd i feel incrediably guilty. Like i just want to binge and purge all day long because i feel like i should punish myself. I feel like i violated God's commadments. I am a horrible horrible person.

[haPEforever]

i feel like such an whore. O god i don't know who to turn too. AHHHH i just want to scream and cry. Can somebody just let me know that i am not alone. I couldn't even go to church today because i felt like such a bad person. I was like there was no way God is going to want to see my face in church....

[hairprincess]

God always wants to see you, to hear you, to be with you. He will always take you back. Everytime we mess up, He will still love us, and forgive us. That is why Jesus came..to save us. There are many many stories in the bible of people who have sinned, and who were forgiven. King David, adultery and murder just to name a couple; Paul: blasphemy, slander, "supervised" the stoning of Stephen, plus more.There are countless others. David planned someone's death, so he could take the man's wife for his own. This was someone that God referred to as "A man after my own heart." If David can be forgiven for that, than you can be forgive for things you've done. Turn to God, he is there for you.

[SarahMichelle]

God loves you no matter WHAT you do, will ever do, or have ever done. That is why he sent Jesus, his son, to forgive you (and all of us). NOTHING--NOTHING AT ALL-- can separate us from the love of God. We just studied this in church and bible study this morning. There isn't a single thing you can do to keep God from loving you. There is no awful horrendous thing any of us can do that would keep God from loving us. Just ask him to forgive you and help you walk in his ways, and he WILL. God longs to comfort us, longs to have a relationship with us.

I'd encourage you to check out this website : http://christianwomentoday.com/

and this one: http://www.joycemeyer.org/


or this one is really cool: http://www.brucemarchiano.com/jesus.php ---- I think you will really enjoy the slideshow.