View Full Version : dating a friend...

11-18-2001, 04:08 AM
:hugon :bowl :hugoff

hey :fishy ies!!! long time no chat, and all that...oh the joy of my social whorl etc etc etc :winky

neways, hoping that ur all ok, i wonder if i can pick ur brains over something:

my friend.

lovely bloke. properly adore him in all senses blah blah blah...but i feel bad for him. let's just say my rep at his school is not exactly gleaming; the latest one was "oh, that Claire, she gets it out for neone." nice, huh? i mean, i know it's not true, and he knows it's not true, and all the people who mean more than shit to me know it's not true...but still :sad

i don't want people suggesting to him that he's another notch on my belt; that he's dating a slag, whatever. sure, he comes into the group of people who know me for who i am, and not the perverse rumours, but still - the things i hear about me hurt *me*, and surely i of all people know that it's not true - so what about people who *aren't* me???

oh the confusion. i mean, don't get me wrong, i don't want to hurt ne of my b/fs...but especially not him, because we have a good friendship basis. plus i guess i'm scared of when it all goes pearshaped and i lose a wikkid mate :ugh

oh what a tangled web etc etc etc :winky
any advice?

much :love *hugs* and :clover
ickle :touched

11-18-2001, 12:39 PM
Sosome denomic little stupid people are making allegations re. you being a bit easy are they? If you know you don't do that, if he does, if the people who really matter know what, then stuff the stupid ones who come out with such bullshit.

As for dating friends.. well, certainly amongst all my friends who are involved in relationships, the vast majority started off as friends first. In my case, I was certainly friends with my partner before we started going out, none of this 'meet one moment, snog the next, yep, we're going out now' things. I believe that the best relationships start from friendship.

Its simple really: if you like this guy for the right reasons and he likes you for the right reasons, then just go for it.



emma lucy
11-18-2001, 01:05 PM
:hugon Claire :hugoff

I am of the opinion that if you fancy someone - then GO FOR IT. Otherewise you'll spend the rest of your life wondering whether you could ever have taken the friendship to another level.
As for others calling you easy? Your bedroom habits are of no-one's concern.
Why not ask him and let us know how the first date goes :cute

11-18-2001, 04:57 PM
:hugon SFA :hugoff
aaaah, king of the board - u sound like my mother.:sarcasm but at least he already knows i'm a headcase, and how many times has he picked me up off the floor (usually when sum other bastard has left me there...)? he's tall, skinny and wretched to my short, stocky...*healthy* physique *shudders*, so at least our kids'll be normalsized. projecting, me?....:winky

:hugon emmalucy :hugoff
well, the first date (that's already happened) it was all quite amusing really - sitting there looking at each other going "we shud probably kiss but like, ur my mate and i don't wanna lunge at u or nething" then we did and aah bless hearts and flowers and :love and all that bollocks. :sarcasm seriously, he's a darling, and he knows that most of what people say is totally made-up, and that he can deal...i just don't wanna see him hurt, that's all.

i'll keep y'all posted!
thanx for replying
much :love *hugs* and :clover
ickle :touched

11-19-2001, 10:08 AM
Claire, I think you said it yourself:

"all the people who mean more than shit to me know it's not true"

And since HE falls into that category, then he knows the truth. I say that you should go for it with him...I firmly believe that you should be friends with someone BEFORE you date them! So, since the two of you have THAT, now's the time to take it one more step! :winky

Good luck!


11-20-2001, 04:04 AM
:hugon miss scarlet :hugoff

...and how nice to see it in bold :winky i just don't like the way people see me at that school (all boys, heaving testosterone, and a lot of my exes, all in the same year...recipe for disaster, no? :ugh)

i mean, my mate's b/f's noticed, and said to her the other day "it seems claire's rubbed a lot of people up the wrong way, u know?" my darling friend poitned out that it was quite the opposite - and the b/f, having a modicum of sense in his head, agreed that it was probably tru, knowing me, and knowing the boys who talk about me. the people who know know it's all rubbish, but still...

oh well, at least i get a reaction. better hatred than indifference and all that :sarcasm


much :love *hugs* and :clover
ickle :touched

11-20-2001, 08:34 AM
:hugon IckleClaire :hugoff

well dear I would have to say dating friends can be a grrrrrrrrrrrrreat thing, although maybe i am partial, john ahd i started out as friends and now we are engaged to be married :bounce

And as for the people in that school..they are not in your relationship with him so screw'em, you deserve to be happy :grin
take care & if you wanna talk i am here