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the_dragonfly
06-23-2001, 02:10 AM
I've been reading here a lot about daughters and how they don't get along with their mothers, and whilst it's painful, it also sparks up memories for me that make me smile.

When i was about fourteen, i was probably at my disorders worst. My mother would make me eat breakfast. So I would eat as slowly as possibly, measure, precisely, what I ate. I would go to school and throw out her lunch. I would eat a very precise amount of food at dinner.
My mother was frustrated, she and I would yell a lot "YOU'RE ANOREXIC" "I'M NOT" and on and on and on for the next few years. I could drive her to tears, and felt vaguely annoyed when she bothered me for such things as food, or nourishments.

Now, I'm still not better, but my hair's not falling out, and I eat, at least the food she gives me. I look back now and am thoroughly surprised she didn't slap me from here to Perth. I was a selfish prat, I truely didn't care about anything but my weight. Whilst I still care, and panic about it, I have it a helluva lot more together than I ever did back then...

I regret now, a few things about that stage, most importantly how I treated her. I realise now when she yelled, it's because she was scared, and frustrated. When she bugged me to eat, it's because my hair wasn't heathly, I had baggy eyes, and looked, generally, ill.

I guess what I am trying to say is.. I know it can be frustrating for us, and we're emotional, and we cry, and that it's as if no one understand us. And I understand there are some truely horrible parents out there... but not always.. sometimes... it's because they love you.


Take care of you

Suey
06-24-2001, 01:00 AM
Thank u for posting that, it kinda made me think cuz i agree w/u, like w/the whole yelling-cuz-they-love-you-thing. Cuz my mom and i used to be great together, and now i guess u could say my ed is at its worst :edbgone. She always bugs me about food, and its so irritating. Like on the way to work today she's like "I trust that u ate today....cuz i didnt see any of ur dishes in the kitchen" (We have ****apts, and i was downstairs in my own kitchen the whole day so she wouldnt know either way)" UGH it was so annoying, and we had a huge argument after that. I felt bad at work, so i called her to say "i love u" lol and i bought her a Dove bar. But its not gonna be enough cuz i really think this ed is starting to take over everything, like my emotions and personality and stuff, u know?? WHen ur ed was at its worst, were u like this???Like it numbs everything u try to feel emotionally?Ya well anyways....sorry for getting off the subject, it kinda felt good to vent w/o starting a new thread lol. Thanks again for posting that, cuz i know now im not alone in that situation!
:bandwagon

the_dragonfly
06-24-2001, 08:03 AM
hey suey,
thanks for the reply.

When my ed was very bad I was very much like that. Everything else because blurred, or second to food. I remember when I was about fourteen, laughing about something with a friend, and she smiled and said "good to see you laughing again".

It was kinda hard on everyone, me included.. it's always a struggle, but that you have admitted it is a fantastic start - took me a long time to work it out

HippieChick
06-24-2001, 11:37 PM
Two years ago when my eating disorder was at it's absolute worst, my mom tried her own tactics at getting me to stop. I was twenty-four at the time and she had no idea how to handle the situation. She used to yell at me and say "If you go into the hospital I'm not coming to see you". At the time I thought it was a complete insult, but now I realize she didn't know how to deal with the situation. I was over the age of eighteen so there wasn't much she could do. All she could do is watch her daughter wither away.

She knows now that's not how she should have handled it. I guess I have been a great teacher after having come out with my eating disorder:grin.

I love my mom mom very much and have always gotten along with her so well. but it was a trying time for the both of us when my eating disorder was in full throttle.

Parents do things out of love, that's something we need to understand. Even if they go about things the wrong way, they still love us.

:love Adrienne

mini_maz
06-26-2001, 09:47 AM
www hey thank u for posting thsis coz me and mymum dont get on and think i know wot u mean !thanks :love maz