paintbox
08-31-2005, 05:28 AM
MAY TRIGGER ! -- talks about weight, bodies etc --
It's unexpected to me when someone comments on the way that I look ...
At work, I was changing from my uniform the other day and a girl I work with, Lisa, said : "you know, you have a really nice figure."
I replied : "gosh, well I don't always think so, but thanks!" (On the whole I can accept my body but truth be told, due to my BED I'm a little uncomfortable with the way I look).
She continued : "Don't take it for granted!" (said with a smile) "- you're so lucky you don't have to struggle with your weight!"
Me : "don't tell me you do ..." Lisa's not overweight, but has quite a tummy and - that bit, you know, where it goes over the side of the jeans. But she's really outgoing and talkative, and I would never have thought she'd have insecurities about herself.
So then she pointed out her tummy and was like, "hey, it's not attractive!" She said it as though it wasn't a big deal though, it wasn't really a complaint or miserable comment.
But anyway ... from her first comment, I was just thinking - 'if only you knew'. I was so tempted to say something about my ED, but I just can't discuss it. Especially to those that I don't know well. I have binge eating disorder (and if we're getting into details, just a little of COE and bulimic tendencies too). When she said about struggling with my weight ... I'm not concerned about my weight, but I know from my clothes that I have put on weight and it's really an icky feeling to have too-tight clothes. So I don't flaunt my body - not that I ever really like showing a lot of skin, but I realize that I do try to disguise my body a little.
But it was a really nice compliment. I may carry slightly more weight now - now that I am (somewhat) in recovery my weight is stabilizing, although I'm not quite back to my regular body. I know that I'm thin by most people's standards. (but it really sucks not to be able to fit my old jeans)
Her comment put a smile on my face - it felt good to get a compliment on the way I look. Due to my weight gain from BED there was a long period where I tried to ignore my body, and didn't like the way that I looked. Now, I'm not focusing on how I look. I'm trying to establish good eating patterns and prevent/manage binges. I'm trying not to obsess about how my body looks or how my clothes fit. And I think this is really helping me to recover. All the same, hearing that from another person was really nice. It's objective comments like this I try to remember when I'm feeling down about my body.
It's unexpected to me when someone comments on the way that I look ...
At work, I was changing from my uniform the other day and a girl I work with, Lisa, said : "you know, you have a really nice figure."
I replied : "gosh, well I don't always think so, but thanks!" (On the whole I can accept my body but truth be told, due to my BED I'm a little uncomfortable with the way I look).
She continued : "Don't take it for granted!" (said with a smile) "- you're so lucky you don't have to struggle with your weight!"
Me : "don't tell me you do ..." Lisa's not overweight, but has quite a tummy and - that bit, you know, where it goes over the side of the jeans. But she's really outgoing and talkative, and I would never have thought she'd have insecurities about herself.
So then she pointed out her tummy and was like, "hey, it's not attractive!" She said it as though it wasn't a big deal though, it wasn't really a complaint or miserable comment.
But anyway ... from her first comment, I was just thinking - 'if only you knew'. I was so tempted to say something about my ED, but I just can't discuss it. Especially to those that I don't know well. I have binge eating disorder (and if we're getting into details, just a little of COE and bulimic tendencies too). When she said about struggling with my weight ... I'm not concerned about my weight, but I know from my clothes that I have put on weight and it's really an icky feeling to have too-tight clothes. So I don't flaunt my body - not that I ever really like showing a lot of skin, but I realize that I do try to disguise my body a little.
But it was a really nice compliment. I may carry slightly more weight now - now that I am (somewhat) in recovery my weight is stabilizing, although I'm not quite back to my regular body. I know that I'm thin by most people's standards. (but it really sucks not to be able to fit my old jeans)
Her comment put a smile on my face - it felt good to get a compliment on the way I look. Due to my weight gain from BED there was a long period where I tried to ignore my body, and didn't like the way that I looked. Now, I'm not focusing on how I look. I'm trying to establish good eating patterns and prevent/manage binges. I'm trying not to obsess about how my body looks or how my clothes fit. And I think this is really helping me to recover. All the same, hearing that from another person was really nice. It's objective comments like this I try to remember when I'm feeling down about my body.